Jenna is a generator. Her job in this world is to live a selfish life path, because by doing that she naturally energizes others.
Following her true passions allows her to feel ALIVE!
Growing up as an only child, I had a lot of conditioning around “being selfish.” I would purposely put others first and make sure they were taken care of, even if that meant abandoning my own preferences and desires, so that I wouldn’t be seen as selfish. NOW, it makes hella sense that I am DESIGNED to be selfish…because I can feel the difference when I’m saying yes to things that light me up and confidently saying no to things that don’t. It’s when I sacrifice my own inner knowing and do what everyone else says I “should do” that I feel frustrated and annoyed…aka, my “not self theme” in Human Design.
I’ve also learned that my people pleasing
comes from having an undefined emotional solar plexus. I don’t create my own emotions - and when I’m around people who have this defined, I take on their emotions and amplify them x10. As a kid, my conditioning started here…I knew what buttons to avoid pressing with those closest to me, because I didn’t want to experience their “emotional high” or their “emotional low.” I became the GOOD GIRL…I followed the rules. I pleased others. I stayed quiet. And, I lost sight of the fun, powerful, playful leader within me for a really long time.
This pattern of putting myself last in order to please others showed up hardcore at different times throughout my life…
In my elementary school teaching career when my leadership was stripped away by my administrators so often that I finally surrendered to the mundane. Instead of being that eager, bright-eyed teacher who stayed after school until 6pm and couldn’t wait to design incredible learning opportunities for my students, I morphed into the teacher who just went through the motions and clocked out when the buses pulled out at 3:40pm.
This pattern followed me through my MLM days when I first learned what “successful” marketing looked like…What started out as a fun way to help women prioritize their health morphed into burning myself into the ground through a combination of toxic positivity, wounded masculine routines and structures, competition, and wounded feminine energy.
After much internal work, I now see that questioning everything and shedding the things that weren’t serving me is LEADERSHIP. Changing my mind is paving a new path for you. I’m always revisiting my beliefs and staying true to who I am, and I am constantly making the decision to choose ME over and over again. I let things die and fall off when they’re no longer serving me or feeling authentic. Embracing my Human Design has allowed me to confidently step into this, along with subconscious reprogramming and embodiment practices.
Lauren is a projector. As a non-energy being, her job in this world is to hone her own skills, and when invited, share them with those who are truly ready to receive her deep wisdom and truth.
As a child, I had a LOT of conditioning around “pushing yourself to the extremes = success.” I remember always being told that I’m tough, and I would get praised for sacrificing my body and pushing through things without showing any emotion.
This first showed up in my college softball days. I played catcher for a Division I school, and even went so far as to tear my meniscus during practice without mentioning it to anyone for the rest of the season. I pushed through and was praised for my dedication. Even though I was destroying my body and going against what was energetically in alignment for me, I was celebrated. Talk about confusing…
This also showed up when I first connected with Jenna.
Even though we were on the same MLM team, competition drove my motivation with the business, and I was out of touch with myself physically and emotionally. This even led me down a path of disordered eating when I enrolled in a fitness competition through our MLM company, but that’s a story for a different day.
The interesting thing about these situations is that they go completely against my Human Design. I’m a non-energy being, which means I’m not here to create energy for the world. I’m here to be an expert “bird on a wire” and manipulate and guide the energy that’s already here. I’m an expert overseer and I NERD OUT on topics I’m passionate about…I’m not designed to be the one in the middle of the herd hustling and grinding, BUT, that was how I’d been living my entire life.
I also have a defined emotional solar plexus. I have the “spontaneous emotional wave” AND the “buildup emotional wave” which means I’M MEANT TO get comfortable feeling an array of emotions. Sometimes this happens at inconvenient times - like when I need to make a decision - but I don’t have any “clarity in the now” like Jenna does. I have to ride out my waves, then drop into my body to really feel into how a decision will make me feel. This is completely opposite of how I had been living my entire life!
Hell, even during my career as a middle school and high school teacher, I was out of touch. I was constantly trying to keep up with others and prove my worth, because that was my pattern my entire life. I didn’t realize my true gift is my resourcefulness until I finally embraced my Human Design.
we SUBCONSCIOUSLY took all of the “shoulds”
from our teaching careers and our MLM days and carried them over into entrepreneurship. AND - it worked!! For awhile…and also, depending on your definition of “worked.”
We made 6 figures our first year in business!
While we had some incredible highs that first year, it felt like we were constantly chasing our “self-themes” in Human Design of satisfaction and success. We were honestly experiencing more of our “not-self themes” - frustration and bitterness - because we were trapped in the constant hustle + grind as we worked to prove ourselves.
And then, mid-pandemic of 2020 when we gave birth to our babies within 8 weeks of each other, we each went through our own awakening process, looked at our business and thought: “we can’t keep doing this to ourselves.”
Not only did we have newborns at home,
but we were also consciously choosing to burn down our business model at the same time.
AND - it was the best fucking decision we’ve ever made, because it threw us head first into what we like to call “The Void,” and it gave us the space we needed to get to know our true selves again.
Embodying our unique Human Designs has been one incredible tool along our healing journeys, because it’s given us permission to BE US! It gave Jenna permission to lean into the things that actually EXCITE HER without feeling the fear of doing it wrong or letting others down. It gave Lauren permission to stop hustling and trying to keep up with Jenna’s consistent energy. It’s proven time and time again that when she turns inward and hones her own skills, her leadership shines.
We finally get to run this business OUR WAY and only do what feels right for us. When we do that, we step into our true unique leadership roles, and we make a bombass powerhouse of a team!
We want you to throw out the hypothetical rule book
that you’ve been living your life AND RUNNING YOUR BIZ by. There is no rule book. There’s only YOU. It’s always been you…and now, it’s time to get to know yourself so fucking well that you never second guess your true leadership abilities again.
